Wednesday, March 30, 2011

My Mom

First, let me say, I love my mom! I really do, but it is now at that point of time where I am the mom and my mom is my daughter. Mom is 76. Her health could be worse and it could be better. This picture is 3 years old, at our cabin in Mammoth. Since I have not been working, my time has been filled with taking mom to her numerous doctor appointments, helping her clean her place, helping her shop, ect. I am not complaining, but it is so hard to see her aging. Today she had her physical, and her doctor was very surprise that she was still driving, and had a very stern talk to both of us as to why she should not be driving any longer. I kept my composure, my mom did not. I could for once see through my mom's eyes as to why she was so upset. This was in her eyes, her last bit of independence. She has felt very bad having me take her here and there, a lot of my time devoted to her needs. She was afraid my family would resent her taking up my time away from them. This was not even close, my family understood, and asked how they could help. My hubby has been really wonderful, even though he and my mom really do not get along, he does care for her and worries about her. After my mom's doctor appointment, I took her to dinner at Mimi's, a place she loves. It was there I talked to her, a really heart to heart talk letting her know I feel her fear and disappointment of not being able to drive anymore. Her main concern was, who was going to drive her elderly friends to their doctor appointments when their family members were not able to. That's my mom, always worried about everyone else. I told her that there are people in town who were available for that, I would help her get her friends in touch with them. She could still visit her friends in her complex via her walker and check in on them, stop and say hi, drop off a book or magazine she has finished reading ,ect. She seems to find little comfort in this, she was more worried that so and so would not bother to go to their doctor appointment if she could not take them. I asked her to try and get some rest and I would check on her tomorrow, and we will figure this out together, she was not alone. I truly feel that God does not close a door with out opening a window, and this is my purpose in life now, to take care of my mom, with out the responsibilities of a full time job. My mom, she is quite a character, whom I love dearly!

2 comments:

  1. My parents are getting older too- My father will soon celebrate his 80th birthday. He was greatly relieved when the doctor gave him the okay to drive for another 3 years. I am not sure what he will do when he is no longer able to be independent. My father in law once said getting older was not for Wusses and he was so right. It is nice that you are able to be there to support your mom. I am sure that you will help her find the solutions to live as independently as she is able at this time.
    Hugs to you both,
    Regards,
    Anna

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  2. Hi Pam. Can you email me please... as your email address returned my mail.Thanks.

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